Protecting RG and Muddy from Posts of Senseless Violence and Graphic Gore

June 6, 2008

I am about to start writing a series of posts that are probably not appropriate for all of my readers because they contain scenes of graphic violence and senseless gore.The particular readers I am concerned about are Random Granddaughter and Muddy.
RG does not read my blog. It’s probably fair to say that RG does not really read yet in the sense that we adults read a book or a blog, yet, though she can read a few words. However, RG’s mommies are fairly strict and protective about what they allow Grandpa to read to RG. For example, I joked about the Cat in the Hat once, and Mommy (my daughter’s out of law partner and RG’s birth mother) made a face and said she really did not want me reading that book to RG yet. She (and my daughter agrees) feels that the Cat in the Hat exhibits a very bad attitude. RG displays lots of attitude much of the time, and Mommy probably feels that she doesn’t need any help in developing any more attitude from external sources than she generates all by herself. For that matter, she picks up lots of attitude from her peers at pre-school, which is one of the reasons she will be moved fairly soon to a new pre-school.

For those of my readers who like The Cat in the Hat or did as children, RG will get to read about him, some day. When the mommies deem her old enough to read such subversive and adult material. I am not sure what the age is, as I am not going to raise the issue. I try to be respectful of the mommies’ parenting. As does Mrs. Random. And although we did not do everything as parents just like they do, their parenting seems pretty good to us, and not worthy of grandparental interference or undermining, though at times we mutter to each other out of their earshot. As I am sure just about every grandparent in the universe does.

How much longer Grandpa will be allowed to hang around with RG is certainly an open question, though Grandpa and Grandma will be staying with the Barely Extended family at their little house in the middle-sized city this weekend. So I will try to be on my best behavior, though everyone in my family wonders if such a behavior actually exists.

As far as Muddy, the bunny, I am not sure that he reads blogs or any other literature. But if he did read, the series of tales I am about to tell will surely put him off his carrots, or rabbit pellets, or whatever he eats, and cause him to look nervously over his shoulder every time he hears the door open. Even though Muddy lives in Australia. Even though my air rifle (which really works on a spring and not compressed air) was advertised to me as a very high-powered pellet rifle, one which I can use to shoot a pellet at a rabbit from quite a distance. But really, Muddy, it won’t shoot all the way to Australia.

I just re-read Muddy’s blog and he does indeed eat rabbit pellets. He would not like my little tin of pellets at all, as they are made of steel and end in sharp points. And even though Muddy is perfectly innocent, and never sneaks under the fence into our garden and never eats any of the vegetables Mrs. Random planted, even innocent bystander bunnies on our property are in danger from wild shooting by a very inexpert marksman.

However, just to be safe, I will start with a perfectly gentle and peaceful rabbit tale in my next post.





6 Responses to “Protecting RG and Muddy from Posts of Senseless Violence and Graphic Gore”

  1. pandemonic Says:

    It’s nice that the mommies are so protective. But, what do you think will happen once RG goes to school? Will she be tamed by all of the chaos around her? Or totally go the other way? I’m pretty sure Dr. Suess is high on the reading list for kids her age.

  2. modestypress Says:


    I don’t know. I am not sure they know. It’s what I call the “cute, fuzzy, bunny problem.” How do you introduce children to the “facts of life?” No so much sex (though that also), but the fact that as humans we all suffer and eventually die.

    In contradiction, we want our children (and grandchildren) to have as much innocence and protection and joy as children as they can, but we also want to prepare them to have enough strength and fortitude to deal with the vicissitude of life as possible. If you’ve got the formula figured out, let us know. (And religious belief works for some of us, but not for all.)

  3. truce Says:

    Sadly, nay TRAGICALLY, Muddy Rabbit had to stay behind in the UK with my sister when I moved here to Australia last year. I miss him.

    But I am seriously considering getting a new house bunny here in Oz. Even though my flat is not ideal house-rabbit territory (a large seagrass rug in the living room and a balcony are the two main concerns…)

    But your post reminded me how much I miss my pet, so this may yet outweigh the voice of reason.

  4. […] Mr Random has reminded me that I miss Muddy the House Rabbit. […]

  5. Spectrum Says:

    Greetings, Random. It is I, Spectrum, resurfaced from your Blogsource past. I see the Random family still acts as your muse. Just thought I’d say “hello”.

  6. modestypress Says:

    Out of the mists, a shadowy figure emerges. Or am I just imagining things…

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