RG Braces Herself for a Gaggle of Ducks

July 1, 2008

Random Granddaughter and Mommy (my daughter’s Out of Law Partner and Random Granddaughter’s birth mother) come to visit the Little House in the Medium Sized woods on Wednesday. I’m trying to take the day off, but in the wonderful new world of my job (motto: “making the world safe for bureaucracy”), I might not be able to get the days off because I didn’t apply  for vacation time far enough in advance (“We measure time in eons”).The Friendly Neighbors have begun raising a flock of chickens (“We lay eggs!”) and a gaggle of ducks (“We eat slugs and we don’t even gaggle, though we do have to brace ourselves”), and RG has been invited to visit the birds during her day on the island. Mrs. Random has picked some strawberries (snatching them from the jaws of slugs, chipmunks, and perhaps even dinosaurs just in the nick of time) and will serve them to RG (“Berries provide all the nutrients needed to sustain life”).

I talked to Mommy on the phone yesterday. Now that RG has been rescued from the inappropriate pre-school, she has been attending summer day camp at the school for high-IQ children. Apparently she is too introverted for permanent enrollment, but she is allowed to visit them for a week at a time.

Among other educational/recreational activities, RG has been studying dinosaurs.

“What in the heck does a ‘dinosaur’ mean to a four-year-old child?” Mrs. Random asked scornfully when I updated her about RG’s studies.

“Beats me,” I answered. “It probably falls in the same category as learning about the Solar System and the names of the planets,” something RG studied at her old pre-school. We both contemplated what Pluto means to a four-year-old.

No doubt RG can probably explain to us that Pluto isn’t even considered a planet any more. Modern children are way ahead of their grandparents. Anyone who can keep track of a family tree as complicated as hers is clearly a genius child who can keep track of the comings and goings of planets without blinking an eye.






6 Responses to “RG Braces Herself for a Gaggle of Ducks”

  1. vroni1208 Says:

    Pluto isn’t a planet anymore? *dumbfounded* Well, when I was RG’s age, the only Pluto I knew was sidekick to Mickey. She is WAY more advanced, obviously, and will be running the world when I am back in diapers. 🙂

  2. pandemonic Says:

    Where’ve you been, vroni? I think the demotion of Pluto came a couple of years ago. Poor thing.

    Why schools indoctrinate preschoolers with dinosaurs is beyond me, but it’s an age-old tradition now. Better she concentrate on ducks, the descendants of dinosaurs.

  3. spectrum2 Says:

    We study dinosaurs here as well (2 1/2 yrs. old and we know triceratops and the like). We have these foam dinos that float in the tub. Dad and I are learning a lot.

    Been thinking about nice neighbor lady–have you heard her say (imitating Charlton Heston), “Get you paws off me you da**, dirty chipmunks!”? Just curious 🙂

  4. modestypress Says:

    It’s going to get grim.

  5. truce Says:

    In my experience, there are only two types of people who can correctly pronounce and identify more than 3 different species of dinosaurs:
    1) Palaeontologists with PhDs and beards
    2) children under 5

  6. modestypress Says:

    Well, truce, Michael Crichton (one of my wife’s favorite authors) probably belongs on your list.

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