8th Thing Wrong with Me

October 8, 2008

All of my life I did very poorly in all my jobs. However, in many of my jobs I would sometimes solve problems or perform tasks nobody else could solve or perform. To describe the general attitude about me by most of the bosses I’ve ever had, the term I use is exasperation. To describe the attitude I have about most of the bosses I had, the term I use is exasperation.

Exasperation neither tastes very good nor is it very nutritious. In fact, exasperation tastes exactly like lima beans, except worse. I once read an article in a Black Muslim newspaper (American “Black Muslims,” not black Muslims in Nigeria) seriously (I guess) asserting that lima beans were the product of a plot by white people to poison black people. I am not making this up.

When my daughter was little, about the age Random Granddaughter is now, we used to eat frozen mixed vegetables (heated up, of course).

(The heated up frozen vegetables were the vegetable “course” along with the main course we were having on a particular evening. The main course might be hamburger or macaroni and cheese. We have never eaten very “fancy” most of the time, and we were rather “poor” at the time, though not homeless or starving.)

 The frozen vegetables (which we no longer eat, because we eat fresh vegetables we grew or purchased at the famers market) included a few lima beans. My daughter refused to eat lima beans and insisted we pick all the lima beans out of her serving before she would eat it. Then, when she was about five years old, Random Daughter decided she liked lima beans, and my wife and I would pick the lima beans out of our servings and add them to my daughter’s serving. However, we have never tried to grown lima beans in our gardens.

What do lima beans have to do with my doing poorly at my jobs? Did I mention my ADHD problem?


7 Responses to “8th Thing Wrong with Me”

  1. Pete Says:

    You MUST be a fan of Dave Barry. And He would be a fan of yours if he ever found your blog.

  2. modestypress Says:

    Pete, your comment is funny and probably true.

    In regard to Dave Barry:

    1) I discovered his writing before he became well known and immediately fell in love with it and considered (and still consider) him a wonderful writer.

    2) I have never had any personal contact with him in any way.

    3) In his favor: he developed his talent with great energy and self-discipline. He absolutely deserves all the success he has had.

    4) In my favor: a few years ago, Dave Barry was divorced and then remarried; I am still married to the same woman I first married and in November we will reach 43 years of marriage. However, in my wife’s favor; she gets 80% of the credit for our marriage holding up.

  3. Pauline Says:

    Lima beans were one of my favorites when I was growing up. The other was peas. Both had to have some butter (or margarine) melted on them.

    When my son was little he wouldn’t eat mixed vegetables (we may have made him eat one bite, I don’t remember), but then he started preschool and they served vegetables and he started eating them because the other children did. But he wouldn’t eat the lima beans, so I learned to pick them out before serving them to him.

    Today he’ll eat them, but he still doesn’t like them. I don’t understand that.

    Now if it were brussel sprouts, that I would understand. But I never serve them, because none of us like them, and I’m sure they don’t have any essential nutrients I can’t get in good-tasting veggies. (My husband claims they’re somewhat palatable with ketchup, but I’m not interested in finding out.)

  4. modestypress Says:

    My wife loves beets and always grows them. As a child, my daughter (Mama to her partner’s child) hated beets; she hates them to this day. I showed Random Granddaugter some beets growing in the garden and asked her, “Should we make Mama eat some beets?”

    “Yes,” she answered firmly.

    RG hated vegetables as a toddler. After she planted and grew a few bean plants, she learned to like green beans. She likes carrots now, as well.

    We tend to work on the “take a bite” system in our family as well. My daughter as a child was a “Go along to get the adults out of my way,” child. My granddaughter is a “I’ll fight the adults who boss me around to the death,” child.

    It is amazing how much of a child’s personality is visible even at the age of 3 and 4.

  5. pandemonic Says:

    Eww… Lima beans. Same goes for frozen vegetables.

  6. Pauline Says:

    “Take a bite” doesn’t work well with my younger son. If I ever need to have him throw up, I can just have him try to eat some veggies.

    Growing them in our own garden did make him want to try them. He took one tiny bite of one of the three wax beans (he had planted two seeds in Cub Scout day camp, one survived and produced three beans – three pods, that is), and one tiny bite of one of the tomatoes (we bought the plant when it was already a foot high, and it has produced at least a dozen small tomatoes, which doesn’t seem like a fantastic return for a $4 plant, but isn’t terrible either).

    He managed to get the bite of bean down, smiled bravely and gave a thumbs up, but didn’t want any more. He couldn’t manage to swallow the bite of tomato because it had a seed, which he found revolting. (He can eat banana seeds only because they’re so tiny he forgets they’re there.)

  7. I love lima beans, but then, I’m white, so I’m probably immune to them.

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