Suppressed Childhood Memory

October 22, 2008

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I am having too much fun. I need to get a grip. This is all about David, not about me.

David has suppressed memories of his childhood, for good reasons, I’m afraid; to protect himself against remembering terrible things that happened to him.

I remember my childhood as being terrible. I’ve gotten a lot of mileage out of feeling sorry for myself about how badly my father treated my mother, my brother, and myself.

Last night I got in touch with a suppressed memory. I remember my brother, my sister, and myself jumping up and down on a couch and getting hysterical. I remember our parents saying to us, “You’re getting too excited. Pretty soon someone is going to get hurt and you are all going to start crying.”

I remember my sister crying hysterically. We were indeed having too much fun.

It is incompatible with my “stance” of my oppressed childhood to recall that we sometimes had fun in my family. So I have suppressed those memories. Unfortunately, or fortunately, one of those memories broke through.

I was having too much fun with surrealist dwillings, plotting trips for David to meet truce in France, and other jumping up and down on the couch. I am suffering a hangover today. Also we have a staff meeting at work and I am very likely to mention the elephant in the room. This will not go over well at all.

However, I have to tell you about how my wife and I met. This embarrasses me hugely. Next post.

10 Responses to “Suppressed Childhood Memory”

  1. It’s funny how focusing on someone else can bring up things from inside yourself. I think that may be one of the reasons we should do it more. 🙂

  2. David Says:

    I keep wondering whether you’ll make it to retirement … perhaps you’ll go out riding an elephant?

    I can’t wait to hear how you and Mrs. Random met. Also, there is something for you over on the private blog.

  3. Average Jane Says:

    Mention the elephant in the room? Ah, what does that mean?

  4. AJ, it means to bring up the problem everyone knows exists but is trying very hard not to mention.

  5. truce Says:

    I’m looking forward to hearing about how you and Mrs Random met. Embarrassing, you say? Excellent!

    Rather a wonderful breakthrough to have retrieved that memory of you all having fun as children, even if it does counter your accepted view of your past. I think it may be vital for us all to understand that things are rarely as simple as either ‘happy’ or ‘sad’, ‘good’ or ‘bad’. We can have periods of both, without BEING either one permanently.

  6. pandemonic Says:

    I can’t wait to hear about Mrs. R. You have me on pins and needles.

  7. vroni1208 Says:

    Is the hangover the “elephant in the room”? That’s how I read it…

  8. modestypress Says:

    I think some of the elephants may need to find new forests or savannas.

    Actually, in my usual ADHD manner, I had gotten the day of the meeting incorrect, so I didn’t have to go to a meeting and pretend not to notice elephants or notice people hunting elephants.

    If you really desperately need to know more, email me for a brief, less cryptic answer.

  9. Corina Says:

    I remember telling my kids not to jump on the bed or they might get hurt. Then one day I drove in the driveway and saw my son run out to the car. My daughter had fallen while jumping on the bed and we were off to the ER for stitches.

  10. Average Jane Says:

    Thanks, cat..thought that was what it meant. I never notice elephants myself, no, not even if they came sat on my lap.

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