Eye Surgeons and Horror Movies
July 15, 2009
I went to the eye surgeon yesterday for the final evaluation of my cataract-repaired right eye.
I figure doctors lives are a bit tedious what with saving lives and telling people they will die. So far doctors have saved my life once from an unknown disease (about four years ago), and saved an eye from cataract-impaired fuzziness (still in progress). I try to thank them by tossing a nugget of unexpected humor into their rushed lives.
The eye surgeon entered the examining room. While he was washing his hands, I figured he could multi-task by listening to my pathetic attemps at humor.
I said, “I killed two rabbits using my new and improved eye.”
“Oh,” he said, without interest.
I tried my second attempt. I said, “Did you know there is a horror movie based on corneal replacement surgery?”
“Really? I didn’t know that.”
I could tell he was hooked.
I told him about the Chinese horror movie Gin gwai. (According to the Rotten Tomatoes web site, it is much better than the American remake, The Eye. I don’t really know. Horror movies creep me out and I seldom watch them. Having the surgeon slice in to my eye creeped me out also, but it seems to be worth it.)
“What is the hook of the movie,” he asked. I briefly summarized the plot, based on second-hand information. He chuckled. “I didn’t know that such a movie existed,” he said. “I will have to watch it.”
He began to examine my eye. “It’s coming along very well,” he said. “Your vision won’t be perfect. I had to compromise. You will still have to wear glasses, and you will be more near-sighted than you were, but your distance vision will be much better than it was.”
“I am satisfied with that I said,” I said. I thought, I will still be able to drive. Bunnies, intent on munching our garden, be very afraid, I thought. “Thank you,” Isaid.
He said, “We can cut down the number of eye drops from three solutions four times a day to one solution twice a day.”
“I am glad to hear that,” I said. “I am tired of dropping liquids on to my eye.”
“Most people get tired of that,” he said.
Still, it’s better to have better to have eyes that see better and require a few drops than not to have eyes at all, I thought.